User blog:Bubblesplosion/UnderOof
Oof walked toward Mount Eboof. Oof: My dad's gone... he won't even notice I climbed the mountain! I'll show my brother who the real boss is! Oof reached the mountain and began climbing the rough surface. The mountain was around 300m tall, barely worthy of it's title. But here it gets interesting. Anyone who climbed the mountain never returned... except for Oof's brother. He managed to come back down. Something was at the top of the mountain. People were too scared to investigate. It was a mystery, not even scientists came back... but Oof was determined to prove his brother that he was capable as well. Envy of his brother's popularity brought Oof to his demise. Oof reached the top of the mountain. He saw a medium-sized hole surrounded by pillars. Oof: I climbed up the mountain! This hole is weird... I'll show my brother who's the brave one now! Oof went to peer over the edge of the hole but... tripped on an ant and fell in the hole. Oof: Oh, come on!! That's not even possible! You lazy idiot writer! Oof's angry screams echoed as he fell down the hole. He landed on flowers. But... he twisted his ankle and bruised his knee. Because one layer of flowers ain't gonna do sh-'' Oof: It's really dark down here... Owww... ''Oof saw a large purple doorway. Oof: There must be a way out of here... or not. I mean, those scientists probably starved to death... Owww... Oof crawled torward the doorway. He crawled inside. There was a small spotlight shining on a golden flower. Then, in an instant, it had a face. And Oof accepted it. Because his name is Oof. Because it's a crazy world. Because it has to be. STOP ASKING QUESTIONS! Ooflower: You... you... I will kill you! Oof: Why? Ooflower: Uhh... Oof: Dude, what the heck? Flower: I am FEMALE! Oof: Uhh... Flower: My name's Flowey. Oof: Want to hang out? Flowey: Uh, sure! Nobody's... asked to be my friend before... Oof: It's easy! Just be nice! Flowey: Ok! Uh, how are you? Oof: Maybe something a little more lively? Flowey: How about this... Howdy! I'm Flowey the flower! You can call me FFF! Oof: Who died that you had to press F three times? Flowey: No! It stands for Flowey the female flower! Oof: Is stating that you're female really that important? Flowey: Most enemies think I'm male... Oof: Oh. Ok. You look gender-neutral... Flowey: YOU LOOK GENDER NEUTRAL!! Oof: I am bald and have no breasts... I have yellow skin and wear normal clothes... do I really look female as well? Flowey: This is akward. Oof: Do you know a way out of here? Flowey: No. Oof: How long have you been here? Flowey: My whole life. Oof: Why are you a talking flower? Flowey: Now you're asking? Oof: Yeah. Flowey: It's complicated. I'm actually a goat boy... Oof: Oh... how do you know you're a female then? Flowey: I'm attracted to boy enemies... Oof: What if you're just- Flowey: That's Mettaton. Oof: I don't know who that is, but I'm afraid. Are you sure we can't get out? Flowey: Even if there was a clear exit, I couldn't. Oof: Why? Flowey: Because there is a barrier. Oof: No there isn't. Flowey: Didn't you see those pillars at the top of the hole? Oof: Yeah, so what? Flowey: I don't know. Oof: You don't know an exit, do you? Flowey: No... Oof: We'll just have to look for it... together! *friendship music plays* Flowey: What is that? Oof: Don't worry about it. Flowey: Oof... I have something to tell you... Oof: What...? Flowey: Umm... Oof: What? Flowey: Water's flavor is it's temperature I'm sorry for ruining your life imsorryimsorryimsorryimsorry- Oof: Okay, okay. It's okay, okay? Don't think I don't think you're okay. Flowey: You think I'm ok? Oof: Sure. Flowey: (Silently) YES!! YES YES YES YES YES YES! Oof: What are you doing with your lips? Flowey: Uh, nothing! Oof: Ok. I think my leg is good now... let's explore this place! Flowey: This place is a lot bigger- Oof: Where do we start? A catlike woman walks into the dark room. Oof: AHH! Who are you? Torioof: I'm Toriel, you idiot! Have you played Undertale, like, at all? Oof: Oh. Torioof: Why are you with Flowey?! He's bad, innocent child! Oof thinks about his sins. Oof: Actually- Flowey: We're friends, ok! I'm good now! Torioof: Oh, it was that easy? Oof: Sure, Flowey's a nice little girly flower. Torioof: Flowey's a gi- Flowey: Don't start. Oof: What do you want with me, Torioof? Torioof: I wanted to keep you safe, but... I guess you seem ok. Oof: Oh. Flowey: Torioof, can you take us to your house? Torioof: No. The End. Torioof: Just kidding... of course! Oof: Yay! Toriel leads the duo to her house. Oof: Nice home... what's that smell? Flowey: No please don't sa- Torioof: Fried snails with Giant African Snail diarrhea smeared all over them. Oof almost pukes. Flowey: So... are we staying over? Torioof: Well, only if the human desires you to stay here, Flowey. Torioof gives Flowey an angry look. Torioof: Oof, would you like Flowey to stay here for the night? Oof: Sure! Toriel gives Flowey a you-got-lucky-today type of look. Flowey: (Silently) YES!!!!! Oof: What's wrong with Flowey's lips? Flowey: Nothing!! Torioof: Alright you two, make yourself at home. Except you, Flowey, you homeless disgusting morbid piece of sh- Oof: I call the first room! Flowey: No me! Oof: No u! Wait... Flowey: Yay! Oof: No fair! I want that room! Flowey: How 'bout I tear you to pieces, yellow boy?! Oof: I'd like to see you try... Ms. Flower! Flowey: I'll wreck you! Oof: Go to hell! Torioof: Now children... please calm down. Flowey: I'm a grownup! Oof: More like a teenager... Flowey: I'll give you a big fat pimple on the side of your head, how's that?! Oof: You're not even old! Flowey: I'm fully grown! Oof: For flower standards! Flowey: F@#$ you! Oof: Did you just say Fatsignnumbersymboldollarsign to me?! Flowey: Heck yeah I did! Oof: I'll kill you! Torioof: CHILDREN! You can both sleep in the same room! Just let me put another bed inside. Oof: I don't want to sleep in the same room as a talking flower! Flowey: Well, too bad. Oof: Aren't you angry?! Flowey: Nah. Oof: Oh. Torioof drags a bed to the room. The children-'' Flower: I'm a teenager!! ''No you're not. Oof: I'm older than you, so I'm an adult! Flowey: How do you know?! Oof: You don't even have leaves. Flowey: Oh. Just shut up! The teenagers both go to sleep. The next morning, Flowey wakes up and shakes Oof awake as well. Oof: Why'd you do dat; Flowey: Why'd you put a semicolon? Oof: Am 2 tired 2 do stuf write] Flowey: Boi! Oof: Screw this place, I'm going back up... Flowey: Why? Oof: Because it's the most logical thing to do, I'll just climb up there... Flowey: What about the barrier? Oof: Oh yeah! Wait, magic isn't real! And why is my skin yellow?! What is this... Flowey: Wake up.......................... Category:Blog posts